It’s fascinating to see what figures of primal sensuality Rammstein have become within the metal world. The German band were introduced to the world via a bone-crushing industrial track and an album covered with photos of them in medical bondage gear. And yet due to a mixture of gender-bending open-mindedness and mattress-friendly beats, Rammstein have become an act associated with, among other things, brazen sexuality. When the band released a box set of dildos molded from its members, no one was surprised.
Casual listeners who only know “Du hast” might not think of Rammstein’s music as being particularly sexy, but the real metal fans know better. Those of us who’ve dug deep into the band’s albums adore those tracks that get the blood flowing, and not to the brain. So here, for your own open, consensual enjoyment, are the Rammstein tracks that we deem the sexiest.
Here are 13 songs that’ll get you all schwitezenlich…
13. “Ich will” (Mutter, 2001)
“Ich will” is one of Rammstein’s first and most impressive club anthems. The song’s synths and rhythms never allow it to turn into full-on metal. As such, it’s a wonderfully sexy track, whose thumping beat and steady repetition seem to actively encourage the merging of pelvises. There’s also some operatic female vocals throughout, but maybe you’ve always wanted to knock boots on a stone altar in Ancient Greece. Don’t lie, you’ve thought about it.
12. “TE QUIERO PUTA!” (ROSENROT, 2005)
Okay, so for some reason Rammstein decided to write a Mexican party song. That doesn’t change the fact that for the hilarity of its horns and Spanish, “TE QUIERO PUTA!” has a kind of heat behind it. There’s something to the complete abandonment of the neue Deutsches harte sound without sacrificing the heavy riffs that makes one think of being fed tequila by someone straddling you. A bizarrely hot anthem to reckless abandon.
11. “Bestrafe mich” (Sehnsucht, 1997)
Slow, hard, thick and steady — man, Rammstein know how to write a sexy song. Of course, that the title of “Bestrafe mich” translates to “Punish me” certainly helps, and the lyrics are easily translated into rallying cries for the BDSM devotee. While Till’s plaintive little vocals can be a turn-off at times, those who are into pain and the sounds that it causes might actually find them kind of spicy. A nice, big cup of your medicine.
10. “RADIO” (RAMMSTEIN, 2019)
On 2019’s self-titled album, it feels like Rammstein are fully embracing how hard they make asses shake. “RADIO” is as steady and steely a track as the band has ever written, and yet it feels explicitly enhanced to make listeners dance and, dare we say, hump each other. A lot of that is thanks to Christian Lorenz, the band’s keyboard player, who keeps the riffs tempered by floor-crawling digital accents. Put your Arsch into it.
9. “PUSSY” (LIEBE IST FÜR ALLE DA, 2009)
No one’s surprised that “PUSSY” is on here. The track — the video for which got a Russian activist imprisoned for two years — is Rammstein’s “My Girlfriend’s Girlfriend,” a thumping goth industrial anthem about sex in the simplest (and most hilarious) terms. While Till whispering about dick size might put some people off, the song’s spooky slinkiness definitely overcomes any performance anxiety. So what’s the problem?
8. “B********” (LIEBE IST FÜR ALLE DA, 2009)
At the end of the day, what “B********” has going for it is its rhythm. While Lindemann whispers and groans like a deranged onanist, this track doesn’t belong to him; instead, it’s bassist Oliver Riedel and drummer Christoph Schneider who keep this one bouncing in your lap. That confident, strutting pace automatically makes one think of various parties swaying their hips and touching their toes. Wonder what those asterisks stand for.
7. “Alter Mann” (Sehnsucht, 1997)
A deep cut from 1997’s smash hit Sehnsucht, “Alter Mann” has all the ingredients of a sexy-ass Rammstein song — stomping drums, molasses riffs, rhythmic vocal delivery. What gives it that extra bit of space is its ultra-’90s street grime feel. There’s a decent amount of artists like Sneaker Pimps and even Tori Amos in the band’s synths and atmospheres here, belying that vulnerable dance vibe of the decade’s not-quite-underground. The result is something unique that still feels delicious in the right context.
6. “DALAI LAMA” (Reise, Reise, 2004)
Damn, this one slaps. “Dalai Lama” doesn’t sound like it’s about sex, and indeed an examination of the English lyrics proves it’s about a much more harrowing topic. But the song itself, with its pulsating rhythm and dense humidity, makes for perfect uglies-bumping music. The beauty of Rammstein is often that they’re sexy without meaning to be, and this song is an unintentional bed-burner. The confusing title only adds to the total mindfuck that is this hot-ass anthem.
5. “Du riechst so gut” (Herzeleid, 1995)
While Rammstein’s debut Herzeleid is definitely a showcase of the band’s disco metal at its most humorless, the record also has its kinky humidity. “Du riechst so gut” is full of pinch harmonics and tireless beats, but that also lends itself to a kind of sweat-sticky, all-night-long kind of banging. While atmosphere definitely helps in the bedroom, sometimes you just need that pounding bass drum to take things home. Might require a blue pill or two.
4. “Rain raus” (Mutter, 2001)
Often, Rammstein songs open with a hard riff before the verse gives way to a calmer part that showcase’s Till’s lyrics. But not “Rain raus” — this track from Mutter just tirelessly keeps up the slamming. That the song is interspersed with eerie female moaning definitely elevates its steaminess, but it’s that piston-style thump which makes it an excellent bedroom hymn. If you hear this one coming out of your roommate’s bedroom, it’s time to go see a movie.
3. “Engel” (Sehnsucht, 1997)
Make no mistake, “Engel” goes hard as hell. The track is Sehnsucht’s most beloved secondary cut, instantly memorable but too hard and sinister for radio. But it wouldn’t be Rammstein without a latex mask or two, and “Engel” adds the riding crop-swinging side to the band’s sexuality. This is definitely the track you play when you’re either getting strapped to a St. Andrew’s Cross or slowly striding towards someone attached to one. Hey, they’re no angels.
2. “AUSLÄNDER” (RAMMSTEIN, 2019)
Few bands could write a club anthem that’s somehow also a crazy metal rager about getting it on. But Rammstein are no ordinary outfit, and “AUSLÄNDER” off of 2019’s self-titled album is a toothsome testament to fucking someone in a different country. The track’s opening keyboards may be pure dance party, but Till Lindemann’s multi-lingual rasping turns it into a slink, after-hours grinder. Go ahead, try a foreign tongue.
1. “MOSKAU” (Reise, Reise, 2004)
At a certain point, sexiness is determined by danceability, and few Rammstein songs are as danceable as “Moskau.” The track’s riff is catchy as hell, and its Russian female vocals add a dreaminess that allows one to lose themselves. That plus the song’s classic Rammstein beat and slow-building energy make it a song that’ll turn an average roll in the hay into a revolution in your bedroom. Sure, it’s about a city often categorized as icy and overwhelming, but then again, it also knows what it’s doing by describing said metropolis as a ‘she.’ Dasvidaniya, pants.
Words by Chris Krovatin