During the initial quarantine for COVID-19, a lot of conspiracies circulated about the nature of the virus — it was a hoax, it was created by China, it only affected certain people. But now, with the COVID vaccine roll-out underway, Americans have…come up with a whole new slew of convenient conspiracy theories, including the idea that 5G chips implanted in the vaccine will be used to control the minds of everyday Americans. Case in point, some conspiracy theorists online recently began sharing what they claimed was a blueprint for just such a chip — only to discover it was the schematic for a guitar pedal.
As reported by Consequence of Sound, a software engineer apparently tweeted a diagram that he claimed certain Italians believed to be the blueprints for a 5G chip which would be put in COVID vaccines, to turn everyday people into soulless automatons.
However, it was soon determined that this was not, in fact, the case — this is actually the wiring layout of a BOSS MT-2 Metal Zone guitar pedal. As one tweeter wrote, “Here in Italy people started to share this figure claiming that this is the diagram of the 5G chip that has been inserted in the covid vaccine…In reality it is the electric circuit of a guitar pedal and I believe that putting it in the covid vaccine has been an excellent idea.”
Could the New World Order be using this vaccine to turn us into an army of sick riff machines, so that they can make us play Judas Priest’s “The Hellion” over and over while they fingerblast each other in their apocalypse bunkers? Only time can tell. In the meantime, someone better inform Tool frontman Maynard James Keenan of this dubious plot, so he’ll realize that the aftereffects of COVID he’s been feeling are all just in his mind, maaaan.
Words by [REDACTED]