Ah, TikTok — Vine with a narrower screen. The short-video hosting site has become the most popular social network of late, to the point where President Trump wants it shut down because he believes it’s a threat to national security (guess he didn’t like your dance). As its star rises higher and higher, TikTok has sucked in members of all communities — including, of course, metalheads.
While most metalheads don’t use TikTok for it’s inherently-intended purpose — either dancing ridiculously or swaying from side to side in full make-up while softly mouthing rap lyrics — they have used it to be funny as hell and show off some rad new music. From sketches to pranks to ridiculous animal mating cries being used as death metal vocals, headbangers have made this platform their own in all the funniest ways.
Here are 10 metal TikToks that’ll get your goat…
@gank_the_gizzardI think people naturally assume I listen to Taylor Swift 🤷🏻♀️💖🩰##fyp##metal##metalhead##metalheads##StrictlyCurls##foryou♬ Claw Marks – Brand of Sacrifice
What are you listening to? Oh God, nevermind.
TikTok user @gank_the_gizzard shows us what happens when your coworker doesn’t recognize you as a metalhead. She shouldn’t even be all that frightened — after all, Canadian deathcore act Brand of Sacrifice just write songs about anime. Violent, satanic anime in which soldiers are disemboweled by demons.
@maniacsonlineSomeone get this brutal walrus a vocalist gig 😂 ##metal ##vocals ##funny ##meme ##fyp ##foryou ##brutal♬ original sound – maniacsonline
Brutal walrus vocals
From our Australian brethren at @maniacsonline comes the video you’ve been waiting for your whole life: a walrus singing to death metal. The thing is, the walrus is actually pretty good, making one wonder why more metal frontmen aren’t training ‘walrus style.’ Collaboration with Gatecreeper?
@mr___seven___Repost ##metal ##memes ##metalmemes ##metalfyp ##fyp ##nextgen ##2040parent ##metalhead♬ original sound – mr___seven___
My metal son
Sometimes, you gotta make sure that your kids have their priorities straight — you know, like making sure they don’t do any emo karate in the pit. Thankfully, this future metal dad has discovered that his boy’s going to be all right. Honestly less embarrassing if he’d been jacking it in there.
@jada_crawford##duet with @meredithbellpb not supposed to scream anymore, but after seeing @uglyskibby do it I couldn’t resist ##fyp##foryou##foryoupage##alttiktok##metal♬ then leave metal version – meredithbellpb
Beatking goes metal
Here, Jada Crawford proves the tried and true fact that every song would be better if it had metal growls on it. In this case, it’s Beatking and Queendome Come’s “Then Leave,” which, though fine in its normal state, is fucking fantastic when Cannibal Corpsized.
@_crustbag_We’ve all met at least one of these dudes ##fyp ##foryou ##metal♬ Razorblade Sodomy – Methwitch
The metal elitist asks out a lady
Sigh. We all love metal, but we’ve also all dealt with that one dude who thinks the way to someone’s heart is to rip on them for not knowing who Celtic Frost are. @_crustbag_ does an admirable job of ripping on these dudes, right down to asking if “you think Nirvana is a clothing company.” Sad but true.
@knotbadCrocheting some Jellyfish and each stitch hits different in a breakdown 🤤 ##crochet ##yarnpunk ##fyp ##foru ##foryou ##metal ##jelly♬ Belleville – Knocked Loose
Knocked Loose knitting
Metal knitting has become enough of a thing that there was recently a tournament for it in Finland (we’re not joking, Google it). So it’s good to see that a little Knocked Loose can take @knotbad’s stitch skills to a whole new level. The boys from Kentucky should do a video knee-deep in knitted jellyfish. Just saying.
@robtackleboxReply to @blackqueenkiraa I am The Metal ##metal ##iamironman ##fyp ##4u ##hey ##comedy ##nails ##fypシ♬ original sound – robtacklebox
More metal than you
We all talk about being metal, but how often do we wake up every day with the taste of metal? Turns out @robtacklebox is more metal than any of us, arranging his face such that metal is all he tastes. Give this dude a fuckin’ TV show!
@mooncitymastersMETAL SCREAM🤘 ##BestThingSince ##singing ##awkwardmoments ##howtoadult ##twins ##megamouth ##rock ##likeachamp ##workroutine ##deeppurple ##chooseone ##metal♬ original sound – mooncitymasters
Two dudes, one scream
Okay, so we’re jealous. Everyone secretly wishes they could do the full-on metal scream, but most of us have to settle for mouthing it in the mirror. But @mooncitymasters has not one but two Deep Purple screamers in their roster, which means they can bite us and we wish we were them. Now do “Evil Has No Boundaries!”
@maniacsonlineATTACK OF THE KILLER DUCKS 🦆😂 ##ironmaiden ##metal ##fearofthedark ##meme ##duck ##followformore♬ Fear of the Dark (2015 Remaster) – Iron Maiden
Fear of the Duck
Let us have this. We know it’s ridiculous, okay? It’s not even a pun so much as a ridiculous thing you think at a metal show and snicker about. JUST LET US HAVE THIS.
@elijah_sellsA little late to the trend but I hope thats okay ##fyp##80s##glammetal##hairmetal##motleycrue##transformation##alt##metal##punk##goth##rock##alternative##fashion♬ Glamsformation – elijah_sells
Sees The Dirt once…
All jokes aside, @elijah_sells is echoing something every metalhead has seen lately: fans suddenly realizing that glam was kind of cool and leathering up real quick. Turns out that oodles of drugs and groupies were kind of fun! Now if only we could get that jacket…
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Words by Chris Krovatin
